A Fear Greater Than Death

Even though my mom has passed away  I know somehow she is still with me. After all she made the house go electrically wacky the day after she died. Don’t know that story. Read it here.

So when there are times when my heart really misses her I sometimes just start talking to her, sharing my thoughts and feelings and concerns. I act like she is sitting right next to me and can hear every word I say. I’m not sure how I expect  to get a response. Little did I know that one day she would actually respond and give me a profound answer to a very universal question.

One day as I was returning home from dropping my kids off at school I asked mom out loud as if she was sitting shotgun, “Ok mom. You’re on the other side now, so tell me this. If we basically know when we’re going to be born and at some level of our soul we know when we are going to die, then why do people fear death.”

I didn’t get the “th” out of my mouth before this thought popped in my head. The thought was this. We don’t fear death, we fear incompletion.

Wow! The answer was so profound. So wise. So incredibly not something I would have thought of on my own, I knew it was from mom.

As time as gone by I’ve explained it to people this way. It’s like when you go to the store and you forgot your list. So you wander up and down the isles trying to recall why you were there in the first place. You see a few things that you remember now were on the list and put them in your cart. But you feel like you can’t leave yet. You know there’s something else you were supposed to get. It was the whole reason you came to the store in the first place.  So you continue to wander up and down the isles until suddenly, you see the egg display. Ureka! Eggs! That’s it. You were out of eggs and that’s why you came to the store in the first place. You put the eggs in your basket and feel like if you want to leave than you can, or you can continue to wander around for a bit seeing what else might be on sale or something else you might need. But now that you’ve gotten what you came for it’s ok if you check out.

That’s how life feels like to me sometimes. Like I’m wandering around the isles wondering why I’m here.  I may have accomplished a few things that are important but there is still something left to do. I don’t want to go “home” until I’ve completed the job I came here for.

So do we actually fear death itself? I don’t think so. I think mom was right. What we fear most of all is  incompletion.

Do you know what it is you have yet to accomplish?


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